Hi there. I’m sorry for my extended absence since the last time I posted. I have not been feeling well at all, for the most part. At all. I won’t go into all of my various afflictions, but one that has played a prominent role in my life for the past year was just diagnosed in May as Trigeminal Neuralgia, also known unofficially as “The Suicide Disease” as it is commonly thought to be the most severely painful illness/condition known to mankind. Yeah, good times. Trust me when I state that I would not ever wish my last year on my worst enemy. Yep.
Thursday I had an appointment with my pain management specialist. Naturally, I had to wait for what seemed like hours before I got to see him, but he’s a good doctor and he cares, so I’ll cut him some slack. I’m being scheduled for another Stellate Ganglion Block surgical procedure quite soon. It’s just being used as an occasional temporary pain blocking procedure. The next step will be my having to undergo a Radiofrequency Thermal Rhizotomy surgery. All of this to avoid the one procedure all of the doctors, specialists and neurosurgeons go out of their way to avoid — the MVD brain surgery. Apparently, a few too many people die as a result of that surgery for medical professionals to feel really good about going in that direction. The irony is that is the only treatment option that actually is a cure for TN — the other options are just temporary pain blockers, and that’s all. It’s quite frustrating. If I ever have to go that route, I’ll be put on Big Boy medication that makes Morphine look flat out silly, Fentanyl being the first and foremost. Massively addictive and 100 times more potent that Morphine, allegedly. And, by all accounts, getting off of Fentanyl and others like it is much worse than getting off Heroin. Would really like to avoid this. Of course, I’ve been trying to avoid being put on Fentanyl just as I currently am, as I live today, prior to even thinking about MVD surgery. It would be completely disabling, although in truth, TN itself is largely disabling, so I guess it’s a trade off….
Well, enough whining about that. Actually, I’m not trying to whine, merely explain. This topic is on my mind for several reasons, but as it relates to this blog because I feel like I’m neglecting my editing duties at Ray’s Road Review, the online literary journal where I serve as poetry editor. My buddy and RRR founder, Chris Duncan, graciously cuts me slack on this, but I still feel not only an obligation but a desire to work on poetry submissions. It’s one of the few creative outlets I currently have.
Meanwhile, I’ve got some big stuff going on in my private life. Complications, frustrations, other health problems too, as I indicated, and this morning, yet another doctor appointment. It gets tiring, but we all have our own crosses to bear, do we not? So, I just wanted to write something, to touch base with those few of you who know I’m here in blogland, and who care. I do appreciate it. Cheers!